Friday, September 23, 2011

Daycare Drama

Y'all, this week has been legit one of the worst EVER.

I haven't talked in detail about daycare on here, but it's about to get real. First, the daycare Baby J attends is within the church I grew up attending. A church I loved and still love. It holds many precious memories for me. It is the place I accepted God. So, obviously when we needed a daycare and we could be at the top of the waiting list I jumped.

Ten weeks after Baby J was born, I headed to work and he headed to daycare. I never had a second thought about daycare, which let's just refer to as SM. So, SM is known as one of the best daycares in town. Really, it doesn't get much better. And? For the past four months I've been living in daycare bliss.

This week, that bliss came to a very emotional end.

Tuesday, I arrived at daycare {like usual} and J's teachers informed me he wasn't wanting his morning bottle. This was a little odd to me, considering he sucks down every bottle I give him. But? I get it, babies change, schedules change, especially since we've hit the 6 month mark. So? I told them just to offer it to him and if the formula went to waste then it went to waste. The world wouldn't end and at least I'd know my baby had gotten something.

Jump to Tuesday afternoon. When I picked him up they informed me J just really wasn't wanting his bottles. You say what? My son? No way, jose. That's what I say. But like we just covered, schedules change so maybe we are just changing our routine. Fine. I reconfirmed for them to offer him the bottles and everything was all good. That is until I got home ten minutes later and had a baby who was SCREAMING his head off out of starvation. I offered him a bottle and he scarfed it down screaming at me if I took it out of his mouth.

WHOA! My little guy was hungrier than I'd ever seen him. Poor little thing is going through some changes.

Are you still with me? Please stick with me because I'm going to need some mommy opinions!

Wednesday, I get to daycare. Again just told them to offer him the bottles and toss out what he didn't eat but to really try to get him to have at least 6 ounces. When afternoon comes and I pick up the baby they say nothing regarding bottles so I assume everything is fine and dandy. Only to get home to yet another night of a STARVING baby. WTF!?

Baby J drank 7 ounces and then a freaking one-year-olds serving of rice cereal.

This brings us to Thursday morning at daycare. I ask about his Wednesday bottles and they then tell me he didn't really want any of them {yet for some reason on my take-home sheet it said he ate all of his bottles}. I try to explain that I know he plays with his bottles and yes he already seems a little A.D.D. but what baby isn't? You've still got to feed my kid!! Apparently Baby J had taken too long on his bottle and they had to move on. I then qualified that "too long" was apparently only 15 minutes. I'm sorry but it takes J 30 minutes to have a bottle. But at 15 minutes, they said, too bad so sad, no more bottle for J. EFF!

Why hadn't they told me any of this??

I left daycare that morning, went to my car and cried. During my lunch break I went to check on him. I attempted to be calm in explaining to them that my child was starving when he got home and something wasn't going right during his days at daycare right now. And? One of the teachers had the audacity to tell me she knows my son better than me. Forget anything else they said because I had lost my cool. This momma was raising hell I didn't care if the two-year-olds were in the next room napping.

Once again, I attempted to explain what I thought needed to be done to help Baby J not be so miserable. But they just weren't listening to me. It was as if they were God and I was no one. They knew what was right for my child and I knew nothing. I stormed out of the room in tears. Sat outside the daycare and bawled my eyes out for a good 30 minutes. I wanted nothing more than to go in, grab J and never go back to daycare. We'd spend our days together cuddling and reading, but unfortunately that can't be my reality right now. So I had to leave him there and just let the tears flow.

That night I had a meeting with the interim Director at SM. She is someone I have known since I was a little girl. And she was very understanding. She even said she would personally go give J his bottles every day. I felt comforted. But a little thing inside of me was still fuming.

Are you still with me? Please say yes. We're almost done, I promise.

Today, I took J in late because of our pedi appointment. So when we got there all the babies were asleep. I thought it was perfect timing to explain what I decided was the best idea for getting J to eat and be happy again. And? The two teachers barely acknowledged I was in the room. They said maybe one word to me and honestly? I wasn't sure if they even heard how I wanted his feeding schedule to go.

Furious, I headed out of the room straight for the Director's office. I explained how rudely I had just been treated and that I'd appreciate if she would relay to them how he should be fed since they apparently can't see me standing in front of their freaking faces.

And now, I'm  left fuming at the thought of taking J to daycare and having to see those two teachers whom up until yesterday I respected and adored.

I know I just rambled on forever, but you working moms with little babes in daycare must understand my woes. I'm now worried he won't be adequately taken care of because I have managed to piss off his teachers. I feel uncomfortable leaving him in that room with them. And what's even worse is it's all I can think about all day at work. No mom needs that.

For those of you who made it to the end of this post please, help me out.

Moms, if you've been through this please comment. I would love to hear any daycare story you have. If you don't want to comment email me{ magnoliamom365@gmail.com }. 

Thanks for letting me vent, y'all. Love you all to pieces.


15 comments:

  1. I just wanted to let you know I read your whole post. I have an almost 5 month old I stay home with so I don't know how much I can help. When are you starting solids? Maybe that would help or a different nipple? If you are uncomfortable leaving him there you need to find a place you are comfortable with, end of story. You know best!

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  2. Oh honey I feel for you! I say if you don't feel right about leaving him there look for something else. Your mind will be much more at ease if you're comfortable with the people watching your baby. What they did was really wrong!

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  3. I read the whole post and I am fuming for you! That is not right at all!! If the director does not immediately implement change and make sure that no matter how long it takes Baby J to finish his bottle, he is being fed a full feeding each time, I'd be looking for other daycare. And if I were you, I'd be tracking exactly how much formula is sent/used and I'd have a cooler there for them to put the empty bottles in without them dumping them, so you can see how much Baby J is eating at each feeding.
    If there is not immediate change to your satisfaction, then I would report them to the state or whatever agency oversees the daycare. (In my county in NY there is a child development council that assists with finding daycare, monitoring, and any problems that come up. All licensed day care providers are overseen by the state as well.
    I really hope things get better soon.

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  4. I'm not a mom but let me just say if I were you I would have already taken him out of that daycare. You do not deserve to be treated w/ such disrespect by the teachers and your baby needs to be fed no matter how long it takes. Do you have someone who could watch him until you find a new daycare situation?

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  5. I would be so mad too! I am lucky to be a SAHM, but if I was working and someone told me that they knew my child better I would have gone off just like you did. I can't believe they are sending home a starving child...I'm so sorry having to deal with this.

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  6. Oh and I would also suggest maybe going to a faster nipple flow if you haven't already. Hope this helps :)

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  7. I haven't been in your shoes but am praying for you! It's not easy when seemingly you have no control over the situation.

    I agree with Natalie about the faster flow nipple--we figured that out the hard way too and very soon found ourselves with the one for "aggressive easters." I'd say --lazy eaters! :) Kidding.

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  8. I was going to suggest what Natalie did - try moving up a size in bottle nipples and see if that helps him take his bottle a little faster.

    Still, though.. I'm so sorry you've had to deal with such rude behavior. No one knows your child better than you do. How dare they say they do! UGH, I'm mad for you. :(

    I hope things work themselves out soon. If not, though, you may want to look for a different daycare provider. Is there a home daycare nearby? Colin (8 months) is going to a home daycare at a lady's house right now, and he seems to have a great time there. He's only one of six kids, and he gets a lot of one on one attention.

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  9. Oh honey! I am so sorry! Can you move to a size 3 nipple. I started Zane on a size 3 nipple when he was 4.5 months. I hope things get better with the daycare and the feeding situation.

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  10. Oh yikes! I am so sorry that you are going through this. That is crazy that they take his bottle away if he is slow to drink it. It makes absolutely no sense. At our last daycare (we only left because hubby got laid off and stays home now) I know they let kids take their time with food and bottles because occasionally there'd be a baby with a bottle when the others were all done and already playing.

    Our first daycare was a nightmare. There was a known repeat biter. After 2 incidents and us making it clear to keep her away from our kid and do something (we were looking for another daycare but both working 40+ hours a week and having a hard time finding one in our budget), she was left alone with my son and he was bitten, like, 15 times which left purple welts all over his body. It was terrible. We pitched a fit and never went back and later found out they wound up being sued by a group of parents and the director was fired.

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  11. Arghh! Sooo frustrating. I'm still at home with my 4 month old, so I don't have any daycare stories. I think you need to talk to them again and really get to the bottom of it, or would it be possible to switch daycares?
    Adding you to my reading list btw :)

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  12. I just ready your entire post and all I can say is wow. I know that our little girl had some issues with taking her bottle and our daycare tried for an hour and usually she would end up taking it before the end of that hour. That is absurd that they would do that to a child.

    I would definitely be looking for a different daycare because if you dont feel comfortable being there and the people keeping your child then you will probably always worry about your little one.

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  13. Um...I'm a new "mom" but to three big boys. I wish I could help! Instinct says: look for a new day care. Or a nanny.

    New follower from the Mommy blog hop, would love a follow-back:

    DAES of Our Lives
    Royal daughter Designs

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  14. Hi!! I'm stopping by and following from Monday Monkey Blog Hop. I hope you'll check out my blog Frazzled Mama at http://frazzled-mama.com and follow me back.

    Hope you have a great week.

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  15. Oh my! I'm so sorry you had to go through this! I read the whole post and was wanting to scream at these ladies too! From a post you have since wrote I think you have found something that works for you so I hope things continue to go better!

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