Monday, November 28, 2011

Unexpected Emotions

This day at work has easily been my hardest ever.

I was nervous about coming back to work after a week vacation mainly because you never know what kind of madness you're walking in to. But I came into the office this morning to find that it was pretty dull around here while I was gone.

What I never expected though was to find myself crying in my office by 10 am. Yes, crying. Like had to close the door, get out my kleenex and pray no one heard me.

The truth is, I miss my baby. That sweet little nugget that I dropped off at daycare this morning has been tugging at my heart all day.

Last week was amazing. Truly. Our vacation was wonderful. Seeing my SIL was fabulous {I love her}. And? Being able to play with my baby whenever I wanted {or you know when Grandma wasn't} was the greatest thing on earth.

This isn't the first time I've whined about my dreams of being a SAHM. And if you follow me on Twitter you've heard me bitch about it all day. But my lovely readers, there are some days that it feels wonderful to hand that crying baby over to daycare. And then there are days like today when I'd trade anything to be home with my little dude.

To you mommas who have the privilege to stay home, I hope you realize how blessed you are to spend these special days with your children. To other working mommas, how do you manage to cope on tough days like these?

11 comments:

  1. Sending some hugs your way! Hoping tomorrow is easier than today. A good cry is totally allowed, even in the workplace!

    Also, I follow you on Twitter now. :) I'm shannon929!

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  2. HUGS!

    I completely understand. I work from home but do have to go into the office once in awhile. It is VERY difficult to just not walk away from my computer and play with my babies. I envy all the stay at home moms out there. I wish that we could do it but we just cannot at this time.

    I hope your day tomorrow is better :)

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  3. I'm really glad you posted this. I stay home and some days, it gets very overwhelming. Just know that your baby knows you love him and that you are doing what u need to do to keep a good lifestyle. Sometimes I want to be at work, but all I really need is a few hours away just to get refreshed. Hang in there girl- wveryoe has these days.

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  4. :( I'm sorry you had a rough day!

    I'm a SAHM and I do know how lucky I am! I'm thankful that I have the opportunity to do this and I know that if I had to work outside the home right now I would be a total mess.

    Although I wouldn't trade staying at home with my DS for ANYTHING, and it's exactly where I want to be, there are certainly days that are very hard and overwhelming (as I'm sure you know! Any mom of a little one knows those days!) and I won't say I've never daydreamed about dropping my DS off at daycare/a sitter, putting on nice clothes, and going to work where I can interact with adults all day! Every mom has those days :)

    But yes, certainly, I know how lucky I am. I'm so grateful I have the opportunity to do this. It's not always easy (mentally/emotionally or financially), but it's so worth it and the good by far outweighs the bad.

    I'm sure it's hard (there are hard things about SAH, mostly financial in my personal experience), but you probably won't be in that position forever (this is what I try to remind myself of). If you want to be a SAHM, work towards your goal! You'll get there eventually!

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  5. Awww I know you miss your little guy!

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  6. I work and really miss the children, except for the days when they drive me crazy!

    On the days I feel bad I just try and remember the advantages I am giving them from working and how my daughters see me as having a career as well as being a mummy.

    Good luck

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  7. I did the same thing the Monday after E was sick for that week. I cried the ugly cry at work. I snapped at my boss and all i could think about all day was getting back to my little chunk. I have no advice just empathy and support.

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  8. I try and get really busy and find things to occupy my time so I don't sit around feeling crappy and sad. Luckily with middle schoolers - they generally tend to keep me moving. :) I also have a really great friend in the front office that gives good hugs when I am having a rough day.

    Oh. And chocolate and peanut butter. Reese's always helps.

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  9. Staying home with the kids 95% of the time is wonderful yet trying. I had to start to schedule my time so that I wasn't burning out. It's not just sitting at home and doing nothing. It's hard work keeping your kid in line and it takes a lot of mental practice. And after having three babies - trust me...I wish I could drop them off at daycare sometimes, too.

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  10. hi erin! i couldn't imagine having to drop baby boy off at daycare. i know i am super blessed to be able to stay home with him. it must be so hard for you. hang in there!!!! being a sahm has its ups and downs too

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  11. IM a working mom who totally understands where you come from. I have those days especially as a teacher when I have to leave so early and dont get to see my girl before I leave some mornings. Sometimes I just look at her picture and realize Ill get to see her soon. Some days are definitely harder than others.

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