The Closing

As I began the draft of our closing statement last week I could feel the irony in every key. There I sat typing up the last piece of the very case that carried the span of my time with Firm W as I myself came to the close of my chapter with the firm.

Funny how life tosses in little moments like these.

Today, I began my last day at my first big-girl job.

I'm a ball of mixed emotions.

From elatement, to sadness, optimism and concern for what the future holds and the security of what I'm leaving behind. I am all over the emotional scale.

I can't lie, I'm scared. There are so many what if's flying through my mind. My nerves just can't seem to be settled.

There is no doubt that today will bring tears. Tears of joy for what the staff here has taught me. For the compassion they've shown me over the last year. The lessons they've taught me not just as a paralegal but also as a young adult and new mother.

One co-worker specifically is going to be tough to say goodbye to. Ms. H, has been my rock. She's my go-to for all things daycare, pediatrician, marriage and of course work-related. She is the woman who {almost} single-handedly taught me to be a paralegal. I owe her so much. More than anything I owe her friendship. As I move on from Firm W, I hope that we remain friends.

I could go on about how each person in the office has meant something different to me over the last year {and a half}, but I just don't have it in me. I've been coming back to the draft version of this post for a week now and seem to be at a loss. Quite frankly, I'm just done.

I'm exhausted from the crazy week we've had here at work. I'm exhausted from the baby who has refused to sleep all week. I'm exhausted from the nerves that have been my stomach lately. I'm just exhausted.

So, I'll close this chapter here.

In 11 days I'll start a new job. The first job I've ever had to interview for. The first job that has found me, my resume and wanted me to join their team because of my credentials. I leap blindly into the unknown praying He will see me gracefully into this new chapter of life.

Here goes nothing....