The Time I Got My Son Kicked Out Of Daycare

Yes, you read that title correctly. As of yesterday, August 30, 2012, Jackson is "suspended" from daycare. Well, not really suspended, more like expelled since we've been asked to never come back.

Jaw.Hits.Floor.

For you lovely loyals who've been around since I sent Jackson off for his first day of daycare, you know we've had some serious issues with this daycare. I've come here to vent many times, we've considered leaving many times...But when it came down to it, every time I couldn't bear to take him away from his friends all because I couldn't stand the administration at the daycare.

So, instead of tucking my tail and leaving I put up a fight to correct the multiple issues occurring daily within the daycare. Read: rooms not meeting ratio, sanitation requirements not being met, MILK not being stocked (which they are to provide). And the teachers? They started dropping like flies due to disrespect from the new director.

This battle of mine has been waging since Spring.
Now, here we are wrapping up Summer and my battle hit its high point.

Jackson has had a biting issue the past month or so, which we (his teacher's and I) have been trying to get a handle on. Either way, his biting streak seemed to chill out for a quick minute. That is, until Tuesday when he bit a child and it broke the skin.

Of course, daycare called me all in a tizzy because Jackson's shot records weren't up-to-date. Don't worry y'all, Jackson has in fact had his shots. Our pediatrician had just not been able to get them the updated record yet. They insisted that all would be fine if I just brought in the updated record by that afternoon when I picked him up. So, I did.

Welp, apparently that didn't matter because when I arrived to pick Jack up from daycare yesterday there was an envelope stapled to his daily sheet. I opened the envelope and read the most infuriating letter I've ever read.

At one point this letter said "due to Jackson's aggressive behavior combined with your lack of bringing us a current shot record we are suspending him effective immediately."

I went into that Director's office saying, "Uh, I brought you that shot record, where is our issue?"

Only to have in response, "We just don't think this center is for you. So we're going to ask you don't come back."

That's it. Nothing about these alleged aggressive ways (which don't exist). Nothing about not having an up-to-date shot record. Oh wait, because they do! Nope. Just that "the center is not for you." AKA me. AKA this director is tired of this parent calling her out on the many discrepancies in their standards and the fact that she's driven HALF of the staff out of the center in the five months she's been there.

So I left. And I cried. And I'm still crying. Because I feel as though I've failed Jackson. I fought so hard to ensure his daycare was caring for him properly that he was kicked out. Expelled before he even really has words. I didn't know it was possible. Despite that I most surely have a law suit (yes, I think about these things, it comes with working in a law firm), I know this battle is over.

And while I cry in the corner feeling defeated and deflated, Brandon stands proud. What I see as a failure, he sees as a win. He's told me repeatedly that I stood firm for my beliefs, that I spoke for Jackson and that as his mom I did him good.

Brandon would say that we've lost this battle with the daycare, but we've won the war. We stood united in how we feel a daycare should treat its children and parents, as well as the ultimate standards a facility should have for itself (which this one clearly doesn't).

Now? Well, now, we move on.

Over the last week, Brandon and I had already been discussing pulling Jackson from this daycare after today. I'd already conceded that we'd need to leave this center before being able to get into a different church-based daycare. There's a daycare literally two minutes from our house that I'd ignored because it's a "chain" daycare. But I've read reviews, I've called and spoken with the director, asked some of the initial this-isn't-my-first-go-round with a daycare questions and feel pretty good about it.

Our new potential daycare has the same eating and nap schedule, the teachers have been there over 10 years and well they have an immediate opening. With the routine being the same, really the shake-up will be the people.

And this is where my heart weeps. For the first time since being 10 weeks old Jackson won't go to school with his best friend (his girlfriend). They're always together at school, everyone knows they're best friends and they are kind of the cutest thing ever. For this I am sad. Stepping out of my zone and scheduling play dates will be in my near future.

Final decisions on the daycare will be made today when Brandon and I have a chance to visit and sit it for a bit with the new daycare.

It seems my prediction this would be a big week full of big decisions was quite right. And now, I'll leave you to tell me whether I'm crazy or if maybe perhaps you'll be infuriated and cry with me.
Oh.And.Also. We haven't even talked about the ENT appointment! Looks like a post for the weekend, considering we're scheduled for surgery Tuesday morning.

*sharing my story with Cassie for this week's Mommy-Brain Mixer